3 Steps to Winning over Your Inner Critic when You Want to Change Habits

By: Andrea Jordan

We all have an inner critic. It is that little voice that pops up when you least want it to remind you of your failures and your shortcomings. Perhaps it came into existence because you had critical parents or a teacher who was never pleased with what you achieved or perhaps a boss whose idea of management was to constantly point out the areas that you could improve on. Doubt can creep in and you start to wonder if you actually are like that. When you do not achieve the goals that you set for yourself you start to repeat other people's criticisms.

To achieve your goal to change habits and defeat your inner critic you'll want to use these 3 tricks:

Step 1 - Catch it out. You need to recognise when your inner critic is up to its old tricks so you can catch it out. You may have heard it telling you that:
"You'll never lose that much weight. You do not have the willpower to change habits."
"Who do you think you are to set up a business/write a book/look great/get fit? You do not have what it takes."
"You cannot run 10km. It's too far for you, you'll never make it."
"Having rest days in your running program is just lazy. You're too lazy to finish what you started."

Once you have recognised that these comments aren't reality and are in actual fact your inner critic's voice then you'll be able to take control and realise that you possess a choice as to whether you continue to hear it or not.

Step 2 - Make your choice. You can choose what to focus on in your life. If all you focus on are the negative parts of your life that your inner critic keeps reminding you about then it can be difficult for you to see what you've achieved. I know from past experience that this can be an uphill battle to begin with and I recommend that you start with reminders of the small tasks that you have achieved. This is useful in changing your mindset and finding the strength to concentrate on your goals and the steps you have already taken to realize them.

Step 3 - Change your inner critic's role. After you have made your choice you'll want to deal directly with your inner critic. There is no one right way to finally defeat over your critic, whichever way works in your case is the right one. I've found that simply recognising and laughing at how foolish my inner critic is being can be a great solution for me. I point out all the achievements that I have created through my working hard and how foolish its criticisms are. If you do not take its voice too seriously then its ability to damage you will be limited.

You may find that getting angry with your inner critic works in your case, "how can it not see all the brilliant achievements that you have completed so far?". Perhaps a more gentle approach may work for you too. Point out to your inner critic that its original role of protecting you from harm was a helpful one but it is no longer useful and now you need a strong supporter who's there to assist you achieve the goals you have chosen to change habits.

The role of your inner critic could be changed to that of a supporter. That inner voice can instead be a useful one that reminds you to look after yourself if you are pushing yourself too far or too quickly. Remember it is always up to you how much weight you give to that voice.

As Eleanor Roosevelt once said "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

About the Author:

Andrea Jordan is the Author of "Habit Breaking Facts: How to Change Your Bad Habits, Forever!" (now available electronically). Andrea is also a Corporate Lawyer and a Coach.

If you would like to learn more of her coaching tips about making lasting changes to your bad habits and creating a healthier lifestyle then visit www.habitbreakingfacts.net for more information and a FREE chapter of her book.

(C) 2010 Andrea Jordan. All rights reserved

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